~Chap$tick & Change~

So here I am, in Ohio... a semi reliable internet connection feeding through the air into my computer and I'm just as lonely as I was without it. Yes I should be more social here, but I just don't feel it. I'm kind of a lost puppy here sometimes. I don't know what to do. Right now all I wanna do is try and finish Lost, but that ain't gonna happen on this connection.

It's not all awful. And it could be worse. At least I had today off to get a bunch of shit done. But I feel left out, left behind, disconnected. It's my own damn fault though. I removed myself from everything. I've done this to myself. I have no one to blame but myself.

These words are emotional and it's just the affect of the frustration with the computer device. Work sucks, but doesn't it always? My uniform is frumpy, but aren't they always? My bosses are all right, which is an improvement. It's everything I expected and more. I'm good at my job at least. Being a supervisor is stressful but doable. I count the days till I'm done here. I miss the South. I don't think I'll be living in Ohio ever again. The roads are not as clearly marked as they should be.

Dear future, I want you. I'm not a fan of this in between time. I want it to be August. I want to be 21. I want to be in Vegas with my mother and trying not to think about where I should be at that time. I want to be fixing things instead of biding my time with this job. I want to be visiting my friends. I want to know it's going to be alright. I want to be sure I haven't ruined myself.

My parents should have named me Megan Melodramatic Gusler... LeeAnn just didn't cut it.